Teenager Feud
by camteaa
Summary: Due to a UchihaHyuuga feud, Sasuke's a Premadonna, Neji's a jerk, Hinata's a mouse. What happens to them when you mash them together in one team? Itachi becomes Itachi sensei. CRACKFIC.
1. Smack Talk

SweetStealer: I KNOW I KNOW! I'M SORRY! The plot bunny attacked me and now my muse has really decided to come back. This has been festering in my mind for AGES!

Sasuke: I hate you.

Itachi: That's the spirit!

Title: Teenager Feud

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Naruto characters. If I did, this would've totally happened.

Notes:/ Ok. Itachi has not run off with the Akatsuki. This is slightly AU-ish. I am in love with Itachi. I'm supposing with all the Hyuuga-Uchiha hype, there IS a feud. Bear with me.

**They're gonna clean up your looks**

**With all the lies in the books**

**To make a citizen out of you**

**Because they sleep with a gun**

**And keep an eye on you, son**

**So they can watch all the things you do**

**Because the drugs never work**

**They're gonna give you a smirk**

**'Cause they got methods to keep you clean**

**They're gonna rip up your heads**

**Your aspirations to shreds**

**Another cog in the murder machine**

**They said all teenagers scare**

**The living shit out of me**

**They could care less**

**As long as someone'll bleed**

**So darken your clothes**

**or strike a violent pose**

**Maybe they'll leave you alone, but not me**

Chapter 1

The village of Konoha was a tight knit network of intertwined families, close friends, and distant relations. Gossip traveled like wildfire and by nightfall, everyone knew everything about anyone who was worth knowing about. Of course, being tight knit didn't mean there weren't feuds and arguments every once and a while, as soon to be demonstrated.

Anyhow.

It was a well known fact that the Uchihas and the Hyuugas had some bad blood and rocky relationships. I mean, wouldn't you be pissed off if Uchiha Fugaku threw a tea cup full of steaming liquid in your face? Yeah, Hiashi never forgave the Uchiha head for that...

So it was only after the tea incident that the joint Clan meetings were put to an end and the men became bitter and explosive.

Yet, if there were any two more famous rivals besides Fugaku and Hiashi, it was Sasuke Uchiha and Neji Hyuuga.

Ah, the two were infamous, constantly picking fights in the middle of the street, using insults instead of fists and weapons.

"Uchiha COW!"

"Hyuuga DOG!"

You get the picture, ne?

By now, the villagers either sided with the Hyuuga's or the Uchiha's, discretely of course. No one wanted to be Jukkened into the moon, or tormented to insanity by the Sharingan. They honestly didn't care, but both Clans were too stubborn for their own good.

However, the feud seemed to affect everyone except the two most important people to the Clans: their heirs.

Itachi spent most of his time eluding fan girls or training until he got too disgusted with his other teammates drooling over him. His passive temper made him a notorious target for single girls who had no other mantra then his name. It didn't help he was drop dead gorgeous either. He thought about leaving his Clan for good, but he couldn't take Sasuke along! Lord knows he would miss tormenting him...yeah, forehead pokes were fun.

Hinata was usually seen in the garden, planting something green and leafy, or training until she dropped from exhaustion. As a quiet girl, she usually stayed away from conflict and knew better then to ask questions when Neji came home fuming from his latest encounter with a certain 'Uchiha biznatch'. Ah, the insults were getting more creative everyday.

Yes, the two, whether oblivious or ignorant, cared not for their Clans long standing feud.

And so, it came as a surprise when some teams got rearranged and ended up placing Neji, Sasuke and Hinata all on one team.

...and of course, Itachi became Itachi-sensei.

* * *

"You have GOT to be kidding me!" Sasuke snarled at dinner, when Itachi threw down the rearrangement papers, his own black eyes narrowed in disgust.

"Keep in mind I'm not too happy with this either." Itachi said back, his monotone voice tinged with danger, daring his brother to complain on.

He had a spork and he was not afraid to use it. Mind you, it wasn't very sharp, but just sharp enough to do some damage if used the correct way.

...Yeah, sporks are lethal in Itachi's book.

While he had no serious annoyances other then the Hyuugas happened to be snobby and well...tacky, Itachi didn't mind the Hyuuga subordinates. It was his younger brother he was worried about.

Motoko Uchiha, with a creased brow, gave a sigh as she watched her two sons steam in silent anger from their predicament. She set down their dinner and wiped her hands on her apron. Her husband stormed in a second later, his face clouded with rage.

"How DARE Hokage-sama put my sons with them!" he roared, shutting the door so violently it ricocheted right back.

Motoko gave a meek look at her husband and walked over to shut the door. Her look turned to one of dismay as the rice was overturned as Sasuke ran furiously to his room. Itachi gave his father a very cold look before heading out in a more dignified manner, slamming the poor paper door behind him.

Fugaku bit his lip as his temple pulsed with unshed fury.

"I'm not hungry. I'm going back to complain to Hokage-sama about this-this...INSULT!"

He charged out the door, leaving his wife alone in the silent kitchen, her dinner cold and untouched, save the broken bowl of rice. She sighed.

'I guess I'm eating alone.'

No sooner then she had thought this, Fugaku came back and shot an evil glare at the Hyuuga household that was right across the street from them.

"Hiashi will probably do the same thing. He thinks he's better then us." he muttered, shoving food into his mouth, his paranoia getting the better of him as he glanced around, thinking Hiashi was everywhere, spying on him.

He proceeded to choke on the food while glaring at the teaspoon. Evil thoughts brought on disaster for poor Fugaku.

Someone had bad karma.

* * *

Hiashi was, to put it bluntly, pissed off. His volcanic like manner only intensified as he barged into his house, with an explosion of colorful curse words followed by a flurry of angry hand motions.

"HINATA! NEJI!" he roared, standing erect and furious in the middle of the dusty courtyard.

The two obedient Hyuuga children came to him, Hinata shuffling along and Neji walking stiffly as if there was a plank attached to his back.

"Did you hear the news?" he shouted, waving the pink rearrangement papers in the air.

Not giving them time to answer, he went off in a tirade about how unfair the world was and how the Hokage had to have been out of his mind.

"-after all, the Third is getting pretty senile. I wonder why no Hyuugas haven't applied for the position of Hokage?"

He thought for a moment, envisioned the Hokage hat on his manly brow and then remembered...

"We're too good for that position."

Neji rolled his eyes and scoffed while glancing at Hinata who began to mumble,

"Ano, Otou-san, why couldn't we stay with our original teams? I-It doesn't make any sense for Neji-nii san to switch to a lower team anyway."

Neji raised an eyebrow, surprised that Hinata was raising the fact. However, at Hinata's humble point, Hiashi only exploded further.

"Is the Hokage going to make a mockery out of me?"

"I'm sure he's not...you're doing that for yourself already." Neji added the last part under his breath, hoping Hiashi didn't hear him.

Hiashi looked at the children in front of him, threw up his arms in disgust and walked haughtily into his office where he promptly slammed the door in their faces.

Neji gave a blank stare to Hinata who returned it. He promptly turned on his heel and walked the other way while Hinata sweatdropped.

Her family was just so weird.

* * *

After having thought about things long and hard over a bowl of mango ice cream, Hinata decided she really needed to find out why she was being placed with the cold hearted Uchihas and her unstable cousin. I mean, c'mon!

Neji was arrogant.

Sasuke was a premadonna.

Itachi was...

Hinata thought for a moment, chewing on her spoon before putting it in the sink. She couldn't really think of a word to describe Itachi considering she didn't know him that well.

The young girl was a little disappointed at getting switched. Was it because she wasn't up to par with Kiba and Shino? They had been so nice to her too! And there was the topic of learning a new fighting style...she had only just gotten used to her teammates', as she had just been placed not even two months ago.

"Maybe I am just a hindrance after all..." she whispered sadly, looking at her upside down reflection in the dishes in the sink.

But then, what did that make Neji? He was top genin in his year, a wonderful fighter (even if he was a little cold to her) and the genius of the Hyuuga Clan. So why would he be moved down to her level?

Or was it...that she was moving up?

How confusing!

So, after showering and putting on her best sundress, she decided to walk to the Hokage's palace and interrogate the old man to the best of her abilities.

...which meant stuttering all the way.

As Hinata walked along, she shielded her eyes from the bright sun, which was quickly covered by clouds a few seconds later. It was a little cool, and the tiny girl wished she had brought a sweater.

Suddenly, she spotted a rather large, fast moving dust cloud. It was headed right towards her. Hinata 'eep-ed' as she nearly got run over by Speedy Gonzales, first Mate Piss on the Carpet and his partner Capitan Believe It.

AKA: Kiba, Akamaru, and the blonde boy of her heart, Naruto Uzumaki. Catching her eye, the blonde fox boy skid to a halt in front of her and shouted happily,

"Hey! Hinata-chan!"

"O-ohayou, N-Naruto-kun." she whispered, looking at her feet.

Naruto tilted his head as Kiba approached, ear plugs ready in case Naruto went all loud and annoying.

"Ano, Hinata-chan, why do you always look down when you talk to me? It's not like I'm a celebrity yet!"

"Yet, he says." Kiba smirked, slapping the blonde upside the head. "Say, Hinata, why did you switch teams? If you were so unhappy with us, you could've just said so."

Hinata looked up, startled, and said passionately,

"I was never unhappy with you!"

Kiba's heart burst with pride, his face flushing a little with happiness and Naruto exclaimed in a loud voice,

"YOU GOT SWITCHED?"

"Hai...I'm on a team with Sasuke-san, Neji-nii and Itachi-san."

There was a silence. Kiba's mouth dropped about six inches and Naruto gave her the same blank look that Neji had given her earlier.

"S-Sasuke-teme's not on my team anymore? I can have Sakura all to myself?" he comprehended.

Hinata looked down, a little put out at this unknowingly hurtful comment. Apparently, Naruto had not known that Sasuke was moving either.

"T-that's terrible!" Kiba cried, shaking the poor girl until she turned just a little green.

"What losers." Naruto snickered, clutching his sides with laughter.

Hinata watched, dismayed, as Kiba patted her on the head saying how he'd come to her funeral and give an nice long eulogy and serve great food, while Naruto laugh into the next century.

"Losers?"

A shadow loomed overhead and Naruto choked on his own saliva as he turned around to face the new arrival. Pale in face, tall in contrast to the short boy, and very, very, very...black.

Itachi Uchiha loomed over the fox-boy, his eyes dangerously narrow. Naruto paled drastically as Kiba backed away, his words mixing into something like,

"! #$#$ !"

He and Naruto took off like jackrabbit high off of Asuma's cigarettes.

Hinata stumbled backwards and cowered under the cold stare of Itachi. They had only met once before a long time ago at a tense Clan meeting and he had come off as the loner sort. It was rare to see the Uchiha out in broad daylight and not being swamped by fans.

He peered at her, and then walked away towards the Hokage's palace, without even saying a word to her. Typical. She watched him for a while, thinking how lonely he looked.

'This is my new sensei?' she questioned.

Itachi began to walk away when he felt the presence of the small Hyuuga girl following him. He turned and said quietly,

"You don't need to follow me."

She looked a little surprised and whispered,

"G-Gomen. I-I was going to the Hokage's palace."

He raised an eyebrow. Without bothering to ask or even give her a look, he turned back and continued his journey. She ran to catch up with him and fell in step.

"Aren't you lonely?" she blurted out.

He looked down at her, never faltering. His eyes lingered on her unmarked forehead and her pearl white Hyuuga eyes.

"No."

She fell silent and looked down at the ground, a little bit ashamed with herself. As she walked behind him, she stared at the Uchiha symbol on the back of his shirt and blinked.

"A-are you really going to be my new sensei?"

"Unfortunatly." came his monotone answer.

Hinata was quiet until they both reached the Hokage's palace. He walked in ahead of her, ignoring the curious looks he was getting.

Yeah, it was that surprising to see Hinata and Itachi together.

The two of them walked up the flight of stairs in silence, their shoes making no sound as they hit the wooden stairs. The large, awkward amount of silence made the younger girl shiver.

Suddenly, Hinata promptly tripped over her too big sandals and went sliding down the stairs. She reached out a tiny hand, as if trying to grasp Itachi's. Of course, Itachi never hold hands.

Thud. Thud. Thud. Th-. The last crash never came. She found herself being slung over Itachi's shoulder like a sack of flour, his face quite impassive. He set her down when he reached the last step and said,

"Apparently you can't walk up stairs."

"Apparently you don't have manners." Hinata snapped, dusting herself off, feeling humiliated that he treated her so...rudely.

She gasped, and clamped her hands over her mouth in shock. Never, EVER in her twelve quiet years of being alive, had she talked back to an adult. Let alone an Uchiha!

HE'S GOING TO KILL ME!

"G-G-Gomen, Itachi-sa-sa-sa" Hinata was stuttering so badly that she couldn't even say 'sorry' correctly.

She bowed over and over again only to see that Itachi had rolled his black eyes in a very Uchiha manner and began to walk off. Sasuke insulted him all the time, what was so different about her?

Psh. Girls.

The two opened the door to the Third's office and bowed respectfully as Sarutobi nodded for them to sit. His old, wrinkled hands folded as he watched them, a little amused. Itachi was impassive and yet, his eyes seemed to glare at him. Hinata was a trembling mass of nerves and the Third's heart softened.

"Hinata, would you like some dango?" he offered, kindly, pushing a plate filled with the delicious sweet treats.

The tiny girl look up, startled, and quietly accepted it. Itachi twitched as he noted how the Hokage didn't offer him some; Itachi loved dango...Sarutobi could almost feel Itachi's slight disappointment and pushed the plate towards him, not needing words for the offer.

Itachi took two.

"You're probably here about the new team arrangements. Are you aware of the reason I set the team up like I did?" the Third asked, patiently.

"N-No, sir." Hinata stuttered, her heart pounding wildly in her chest.

Itachi blinked. For the first time, the genius didn't have an answer.

"It's because of the Hyuuga-Uchiha feud. It's gotten too big. You are aware of the feud, aren't you?" he added, knowing Hinata was probably too afraid of her family to witness it, and Itachi just didn't damn care.

The two nodded stiffly.

"As you know, Itachi is an Uchiha and part of the ANBU squad, I must move him back down to Jounin for him to be able to teach you. Which means, little or no individual missions for you." the Third added, glancing at Itachi who his response.

At this, Itachi gave a start and Sarutobi's eyes narrowed. There was a tense silence before Itachi finally spoke.

"You're moving me down?" his said, almost tonelessly, but the underlying anger was there.

Startled, Hinata gave a wondering look at her soon-to-be mentor, as she had caught the well disguised fury, while the Third narrowed his eyes. Sarutobi gripped his two hands tighter and his eyes flashed.

"Yes. Do you have a problem with that? It is, after all, only temporary." he asked calmly, while delivering a silent challenge to his judgment.

Stiffly, Itachi shook his head.

"As you, Hinata, are aware, I'm also moving Neji down. I will hope this will not only benefit you, but him." he said, a little more cautiously then he had before.

"Hai..." she replied, though she didn't really know what he meant by that.

The Third looked from one to the other, noting how scared Hinata looked, and even Itachi was a little stiff while he contemplated his new 'mission'.

"Very well. You're dismissed."

The two walked out of the office, very much aware of the tension that was still present between them.

Write some love!


	2. Topless

SweetStealer: I'm so tired. And cold. And dead. I promise I'll update Summer Chaos. I'm almost done, don't worry.

Hidan: Wow. You're an irresponsible person.

Sweets: Whatever.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

Notes:/ Whatever. Muses are bitches.

**Chapter 2**

Sasuke stared at his new teammates, trying to quel the strong feeling of hatred and disgust. Two pale, creamy eyed humans sat in front of him; one stiff, one trembling.

Hinata had her arms around her drawn up knees, shivering, even though it was clearly a bright sunny day. Her soft beige coat looked very warm and Sasuke eyed her curiously. He remembered her from the Academy and always wondered why on Earth she didn't fawn over him like every other girl in Konoha.

Neji was a different story. If looks could kill, then both boys would have been dead the day they had first met. The Hyuuga prodigy sat indian style, his arms folded across his chest, casting an annoyed, yet, soft look at his trembling cousin and a rather hateful glare at the younger Uchiha.

Coldly, Sasuke returned it, his Sharingan eyes filled with the slightest hint of murderous intent.

And Itachi wondered why Hinata was shaking. He was away from the glare-off so he didn't get the impact of it. Poor Hinata was smack dab in the middle.

Said Uchiha was sitting on a tree branch, high above them, looking down impassively and a little peeved that he was demoted back to Jounin. To put it bluntly, it sucked ass. He wasn't part of the family feud so why the hell should he have to teach brats how to fight?

Sighing, he decided to stop the glare-off before kunai got whipped out and blood was spilled. Not that Itachi would've minded; he would've liked to see a fight between Neji and Sasuke.

But there was the problem of Hinata...

"That's enough." he said a little sharply.

Sasuke, a little startled, looked up to see the black eyes of his brother glaring down at him. Neji blinked, and looked up as well, then raised an eyebrow. Hinata gave a tiny 'eep' and shrunk deeper into her baggy coat, making her look like a indigo haired turtle.

"Hokage-sama said that the team arrangements would be like this for a little while so just bear with me." he said dully, really wishing he was dead right now.

He looked at the tiny slip of paper in his hands. It was helpful hints from Kakashi as to how to re-introduce everyone to each other without having the two irrational boys send each other to the hospital and the timid girl go into a self-induced coma.

Clearing his throat, he said tonelessly,

"Okay. Let's just start with our names and what we like to do for fun." Itachi's eyebrow cocked upwards as he read, feeling very stupid while reading the slip of paper. "Sasuke, go first."

"But-"

"Just do it." Itachi hissed, rubbing his temples, already pissed.

"Fine." Sasuke grumbled. "Sasuke Uchiha. I like being alone."

Neji rolled his eyes and Hinata sighed, more then a little disheartened at Sasuke's short 'informational' speech. Itachi put a hand over his eyes and said in a monotone voice,

"That was depressingly short."

"Like I care." Sasuke snorted, turning his head away.

Itachi nodded to Neji who growled but went ahead and said his part.

"Neji Hyuuga. I like sleeping, training, and going on tough missions. I hate arrogant pricks and unfair people."

Sasuke's ears perked up at the mention of arrogant pricks.

"Why you-"

"And lastly..." Itachi cutting off Sasuke and nodding to Hinata, already bored.

The two haughty boys deflated and listened to Hinata's nervous speech. Mind you, Neji didn't really talk to her, and had no idea what she liked. Sasuke just sat there, a little annoyed, but was curious because she never spoke much at the Academy and still had yet to hear her say a full sentence.

"I'm H-Hinata Hyuuga. I like gardening, pressing flowers, and cooking." she whispered, talking to the air above the two boys' heads.

Itachi looked at her and blinked when she finished. He was a little curious about her, because it was rumored that she was a terrible Hyuuga when it came to Juuken, but that didn't necessarily mean that she couldn't excell at other things like Tai-jutsu or Gen-jutu.

"Itachi Uchiha. The rest is for me to know." he said, indifferently.

There was a bit of an awkward silence as the four of them sat there, wondering what to do next. Itachi looked at the slip of paper and saw Kakashi had written on word that he could finally agree with.

_Bells._

Itachi knew Kakashi was talking about the bell trick, but hadn't Sasuke already gone through that? Itachi knew teamwork was essential to being good shinobi, but there was the other matter of Sasuke and Neji trying to kill each other. And at the moment, Hinata looked frightened and a little useless.

Well then. He would just have to twist the bell trick. Breaking out of his trance, he said in a compelling voice,

"Ok. Here's what we're going to do."

* * *

Hinata did not like this situation. At the moment, she was hiding in a tree, with a freaking huge caterpillar crawling up her arm and Sasuke's hand around her mouth.

"Don't move." he hissed.

She was pressed up against he body in an awkward way, but all she could think about was the creepy crawly bug making its way up her arm. She shivered in apprehension. She was a little frightened of bugs, which put her in a uncompromising position when she was with Shino. She squirmed against Sasuke, but he only held on tighter.

It was about dusk, and the two twelve year olds were panicking for different reasons. Sasuke wasn't concerned about Hinata, but rather, he was looking around their surroundings with apprehension.

Itachi had planned out a mini mission for them, one involving the terror of...teamwork.

The three had been told in a very uncaring way by Itachi to go retrieve three scrolls he had hidden the training grounds of the forest. Also, he had said, if they succeeded in finding all of them before sunset, they would have the opportunity of trying to steal the bells from him if they could survive sleeping together in a tent.

This went over like a lead balloon.

Sasuke and Neji had burst out at once at the mention of working together, causing Hinata to give a loud squeak of protest to the mention of spending a night together in a tent.

They had, however, gone off to the training grounds together, and looked for the scrolls for a little while...that was until Neji tripped Sasuke 'accidentally' causing the boy to go sprawling into the mud.

Sasuke.

Got.

Pissed.

It was then, Hinata had withdrawn to the safety of the trees and waited out the fight that lasted a full fifteen minutes. Finally, the two prodigies fled in different directions, completely forgetting about the mission, Hinata, and their wannabe teamwork.

So how had Hinata ended up with Sasuke you ask?

When the three of them had taken off in separate directions, Itachi (who was secretly spying on them from a far off tree), decided to go home and take a nap, forgetting about his duties as a teacher.

So they had been left to defend themselves in the creepy, darkening, training grounds. Hinata had a run in with Sasuke while being chased by a tiger on steriods.

Veeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrry scary.

Said Uchiha had pulled her out of sight and into the compromising position.

Poor girl.

Hinata could feel her cheeks getting brighter and the roughness of the wooden scroll in a pocket on the underside of her jacket. She breathed a sigh of relief when Sasuke relaxed his grip and slumped on the tree next to her.

Tigers were fricking scary!

"You have a scroll?" Sasuke wondered outloud, as he caught sight of the lump on her stomach.

She merely nodded. Hinata could see Sasuke had one too, having the Byakugan and all, and unwisely voiced a careless question.

"I-I wonder where Neji-nii san is?"

"I hope he got eaten." Sasuke muttered, standing up.

He offered her his hand, absentmindedly, while scouting for more ferocious predators like mutant bunnies of killer squirells...who knew what Konoha training grounds had in them?

The younger took his hand and he helped her up. The sun was almost down.

"Great. Now we need to find Neji and that stupid scroll."

"You mean this stupid scroll?"

The parchment dropped onto Sasuke's head and Hinata caught it before it went tumbing down onto the ground below them. She looked up and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Nii-san!" she cried, as Neji looked down on her with a passive stare.

"Are you hurt?" he asked, sliding down the tree bark, making sure to skid some Sasuke's way.

Hinata nodded fervently and stammered out,

"S-Shouldn't we get these to Itachi-sensei? It's almost sundown."

The two boys nodded curtly and the three of them flashed away from the terrifying claws of the forest of Training Ground 5.

...For the record, Konoha does have mutant bunnines, thanks for asking.

* * *

Itachi irritably blinked as Sasuke threw the scrolls at him. The elder was not pleased at being awoken and he was rather hoping his subordinates had been killed on the grounds.

'There goes that brilliant plan.' he grumbled inwardly.

Reaching over, the man pulled out a dark green tarp which he thew at Neji so it covered him completely and aimlessly chucked three sleeping bags and his brother and the Hyuuga girl. Hinata went flying from the force of impact and landed with an 'oof' on the opposite wall.

"Sleep. Now."

With that, Itachi rolled over and followed his own orders, leaving Sasuke to curse rather loudly, have Neji walk out with a snotty air and Hinata scurry behind.

When the two morons and the mouse left, Itachi looked up from his sea of blankets and pillows. There was a distant rumbling in the distance.

"It's going to rain..." he said to himself, almost thoughtfully.

The silence answered him and he shrugged and went to sleep.

* * *

Plink. Plink. Plink.

Sasuke scrunched up his nose irritably, as he looked up at the darkening sky. Neji, who was flattening the tarp/tent/piece of crap thing, called out to his younger cousin who was looking out into the distance with a blank, yet slightly skeptical expression on her pale features.

"Hinata-sama. The tent's done. You should start on dinner before the rain comes."

Hinata nodded, cast a look at the gray sky and hurried into the tent to get her things. Sasuke scoffed at the tent.

"It looks like a monkey made it."

Neji chose to ignore this comment and instead shoved past the Uchiha with a pissed off air to him and called back,

"At least I made something instead of standing by and posing."

"I did not pose!" Sasuke hissed, indignantly.

"Oh really? That's what it looked like to me-"

Suddenly, there was a great booming sound and a flash of light split the overcast sky. The two boys heard Hinata give a frightened squeak from inside the tent. Sasuke and Neji glared at the sky.

"I-I'm alright!" Hinata cried from inside the tent.

A great gust of wind came and shook the tent. There was a sudden, chilling downpour which caused Neji and Sasuke to turn towards the tent for safety. Sasuke suddenly spotted the rope tying the tent down was unraveling! He lunged at it, shouting to Neji,

"Catch it!"

Before they could grab it, the tent (and all of Neji's hard work) came crashing down, exposing a very naked Hinata holding up her old teeshirt. Her indigo locks were now thouroughly soaked, and Neji and Sasuke could only stare.

" #$#% !" Sasuke said.

"Hinata-SAMA!" Neji gave an unmanly shriek, thrusting the drenched tarp, managing to only make her more wet and cold.

It was then Hinata screamed.

Sweets: Phew. That's over with. Alright. Let's get this over with.

Itachi: REVIEW. Now.


	3. LOVE LOVE Bakery

Camteaa: ...I know, I know. I have no excuses. I can't believe I'm actually updating this fic.

Sasuke: -fuming-WTF? You _**deserted**_ us!

Hinata: Ano...

Itachi: Lazy ass.

Camteaa: IM SORRY! GOMEN!

**Author's Notes:/** I am so sorry to all my readers that it's taken me so long to update! I know that I've disappointed a few by discontinuing some of my other works, but I will honestly try not to let this one go. Now that I'm free from the college work and just have my summer job, maybe I can try to update as much as possible! Wish me luck!

Chapter 3

..::..

The three very terrified genin could only stare at the predicament before them. There was a very awkward silence in which the rain pelted down and Hinata whimpered and shivered under the boy's stare. Suddenly, Neji, with a fierce howl of realization, tackled Sasuke to the ground.

"THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" Sasuke roared, trying to push the surprisingly heavy Neji off of him.

"COVER YOURSELF HINATA SAMA!" Neji shrieked, plastering his hands to Sasuke's face, successfully covering his nose and sticking a finger in his red eye.

Hinata squealed and tried to rummage around the pitiful tent, trying to find her clothes. Neji sat on top of Sasuke, while the Uchiha tried to squirm out of his grasp, due to the fact Neji was cutting off his oxygen supply.

"What have we here?"

A calm, cocky voice intruded on the devastating scene and the three looked up.

Hatake Kakashi was standing on a broken tree limb, looking all cool and aloof, with his silver hair blowing in the harsh wind and yadda yadda ya. He grinned at his former pupil and the two Hyugas with a mischievous look on his pale face.

"Forgive the intrusion, but I heard screams?" he questioned, looking at the blushing Hinata.

The girl cowered and turned away in embarrassment. By the half assed way the tent was and the expressions on the boys' faces, Kakashi could put two and two together.

"...I see..."

..::..

..::..

..::..

"What, may I ask, were you doing with your _**clothes**__**off**_?"

A very, **very**, peeved Itachi glared rather freakishly at Hinata, who squirmed under his stare. Sasuke could sense her discomfort and scoffed outwardly, but felt bad for her on the inside.

'You feel bad for _her?_ What about yourself?' his inner chibi voice squealed.

Sasuke shrugged it off and continued to glare at the wall. Hinata began to stutter as her tiny voice caught in her throat and Neji threw her a skeptical stare.

"I-I..."

It was then, thankfully, that Kakashi stepped in and saved the poor girl from herself. With a blunt smile, he threw Itachi a careless look and said,

"She spilled soy sauce on her shirt when the thunder sounded. It was only natural for her to want to change her shirt."

Itachi blinked. Sasuke and Neji looked at each other with distain while Hinata was showing strange, shaking convulsions as she withered under the displeased gaze of Itachi.

"So far, this is getting us nowhere. You failed the last mission-" Itachi began in a monotone voice but was cut off by Sasuke's furious outburst.

"This isn't a mission! This is SUICIDE! I **refuse **to work with these Hyugas anymore! I'd rather have the Sakura annoy me and spend the rest of my life with that stupid Naruto then-"

"N-NARUTO ISN'T STUPID!" Hinata interjected, quite forcefully, causing everyone to turn to her.

Sasuke turned, and glared at her while Neji, cocking an eyebrow, glanced at his younger cousin with an expression of amusement and surprise.

"...You know, maybe it's not them." Kakashi said, breaking the awkward silence.

Itachi turned his mutinous glare towards his fellow teacher.

"Are you suggesting it's me?"

"Well, you haven't exactly eased them into being friends. You've just given them mission with the assumption that they already know how to be friends or at least make them. These kids don't understand the meaning of 'friendship' or 'teamwork'. And neither do you for that matter." Kakashi said, sighing and leaning against Itachi's bedroom wall nonchalantly.

"And what do you suggest you have me do?" Itachi seethed.

"It just so happens I stopped by the Hokage's office right after I met with you about your new team. He's assigned you a real mission."

Kakashi handed Itachi a yellowing scroll, and as Itachi unfurled it, the three genin watched with apprehension. Itachi scanned the scroll, then silently rolled it up and handed it back to Kakashi, who was grinning under his mask.

There was an awkward silence.

"And you couldn't have given this to me earlier when I asked for your opinion on teamwork?" Itachi muttered, rolling his eyes.

"It was way too much fun to see you finally struggle at something." Kakashi laughed.

"What's the fucking mission?" Neji cut in sharply.

Kakashi smiled, and patted the Hyuga genius on the head, laughing. Hinata looked uneasily at Sasuke, who avoided her eyes and snarled at his former teacher,

"Spit it out already!"

Itachi pressed two fingers to the bridge of his nose, looked down, a little cross-eyed, and said sullenly,

"We're going to run a bakery."

..::..

"Can I help the next person please?" Hinata cried, trying to call attention to the customers in the _massive_ line who were oggling at the three boys behind her, who were looking worn out and intimidated.

Fan girls found out about the Hyuga-Uchiha run bakery.

It was not a pretty sight.

The girls swarmed the counters, trying to climb over the glass display case that separated the pastries and boys from their grabby hands. Neji and Sasuke had spent most of their first morning cowering behind the counter, fearing for their lives. Itachi had reluctantly taken up the part of the baker and had spent most of his previous evening memorizing baking techniques and recipes.

Hinata was surprisingly good at being a waitress and cashier. She was fast, friendly and could think on her feet. Her love of decorating and arranging flowers had transferred over to pastries and she put most of her energy into making sure everything looked lovely.

The bakery they were running was left to them by Kurenai's great-great cousin's aunt twice removed. Or something. She and her husband were taking a vacation to visit relatives, and made a deal with Sarutobi which said that he could have all the free sweets he wanted when they returned, in exchange for him finding someone to watch the shop. And EVERYONE knows the Sandaime Hokage LOVES dango and pecan braids.

So here was Team Itachi cowering, muttering or singing their way through the first day at the 'LOVE LOVE BAKERY!'.

..::..Earlier that Morning/Flashback..::..

Neji awoke, painfully, on the couch in the living room of the Hyuga mansion.

Blinking wearily, he vaguely remembered being sent home around 1:00 in the morning after being told he was going to learn how to run a bakery the next day. He had thrown himself on the couch, much to Hinata's distress, and proceeded to snore loudly so as to shoo his cousin away so he could have some peace and quiet.

Rubbing sleep from his eyes, he looked around for the source that disrupted his slumber. The television clock said it was around 5:00 am, much too early and hour for a teenager who slept in until 8 or 9 in the morning.

DING-DONG.

It was the doorbell. Neji dragged himself to the door and he wondered rather irritably who the FUCK would be ringing at this time in the morning. Hell, even Hiashi wasn't even up yet. Opening the door, Neji said blearily,

"Wha da fuck do yooou wan-"

"Get up. We have work to do. Where's Hinata?"

Neji looked into the cold, lifeless eyes of Itachi and blinked. Sasuke was next to him, in the same sleepy position as Neji. He was holding a thermos full of steaming black coffee while trying to stay upright. Itachi's hair, like Neji's, stuck up in all sorts of different and disturbing directions.

This was an ungodly hour indeed.

"Wha joo say?" Neji asked, his face sagging with tiredness.

"We're going to the damn bakery. Get your cousin up and let's go." Itachi barely stifled a yawn.

Neji, pissed off, slammed the door in the two Uchiha's faces and stormed upstairs to his cousin's room to the best of his exhausted ability. Rapping on her wooden door several furious times, he called out,

"Hinata-_sama_! We have to go."

There was no reply.

Neji, already ticked, was angered by the girl's lack of a response. He repeated his message several times.

"HINATA-SAMAAAAAAA! WE NEED TO GO RUN A FUCKING BAKERY!"

At the lack of sound inside the room, Neji turned the handle and barged in. The room was freaking _immaculate_. A neatly made bed suggested that Hinata may not have even slept in it. Her clothes, however, lay at the foot of the bed in a neatly folded heap while the window was cracked open.

It was at that moment Neji made the most unsupported, completely irrational decision of his life. His pupils were shot to hell as he turned wildly around, raced back to the hallway, down the stairs, and thrust open the door with [another] unmanly shriek and said,

"HINATA SAMA WAS KIDNAPPED!"

The Uchihas blinked.

"Nii-san...gomen, I'm right here." came a small voice behind him.

Neji turned slowly on the spot to see his darling little cousin dressed in a cute French maid outfit, complete with the lacy headband, which was the uniform of many a man's most kinky fantasies. On the left side of her chest were the words "LOVE LOVE BAKERY". To add to the vision, she was holding his own mug of black coffee and an omelet.

"Breakfast?" she asked sheepishly, holding the mug out.

Neji was humiliated the whole walk to the bakery.

..::..

..::..

..::..

"Um, number 356?" Hinata called out to the crowd that had massed inside the small bakery.

"KYAHHH! That's me! That's me!" a young woman all but shrieked, holding her number slip high in the air.

Hinata cowered away, ever so slightly. She had been deal with crazy ass girls like this all morning. Honestly, she wasn't sure if she could take any more of the screaming. Girls were constantly on their cell phones, not even paying attention to ordering, and telling their friends to come over and visit. In her humble opinion, Hinata thought most of them needed to see a therapist instead of coming to the bakery. But that was just her.

"Can I help you?" the small girl all but _withered _under the crazy eyes that her customer was giving her.

"I. Want. That."

Hinata followed the trail of the girl's finger and saw that it pointed to Neji. Said boy quickly realized that he became interesting _merchandise_ and promptly opened the door to the walk-in cooler and shut himself in. He wanted to get better acquainted with the frozen dough I suppose.

"Ahem...Neji-niisan isn't on the menu." Hinata laughed timidly.

The customer looked visibly disappointed.

"Oh...can I have an Uchiha instead?"

"N-No...?"

Suddenly, Hinata felt an overwhelmingly cold presence behind her. She turned only to be met with the merciless black gaze of her sensei.

"S-s-s-sen...sei...eep!" the Hyuga heiress squeaked as Itachi pushed past her.

"Get out." Itachi snapped, ready to sharingan the fan girls.

Unfortunately, he underestimated to the _zeal_ that some of the girls had for him and his pupils.

"OMIGOD, OMIGOD HE'S GOING TO MANGEKYOU US!"

"KYAHHHH!"

"CAN YOU BE MY SENSEI?"

"RAVISH MEEEEEE!"

"LET ME TOUCH YOUR ASS!"

Sasuke peered up from behind his counter just in time to see his niisan's eyes spiral into red. He grabbed Hinata's exposed ankle and all but dragged her into the walk in cooler to join Neji among the frozen dough.

The cowered there the rest of the day.

Itachi, feeling more than a little overwhelmed with the whole situation, decided now was the best time to really Mangekyou the crazy girls and have them leave the store before anything got broken.

He had noted that Sasuke, _in the spirit of teamwork_, had decided to overcome his hatred of the Hyugas and by bonding together with them over the fear of fan girls. In a walk in cooler.

_'It's a start.' _Itachi noted, wondering what the heck he would put on his mission report write up that night.

And so the bakery mission ended successfully as all the pastries (and Itachi's shirt) were sold that day, making Kurenai's great-great cousin's aunt twice removed (or something) filthy stinkin' rich.

..::..

..::..

..::..

Camteaa: So hopefully I can keep up with this updating streak!

Sasuke: That will never, ever happen.

Camteaa: I'm so sorry it's taken like, _**three years**_ to update! I love you all and I love this fic so I don't want to abandon it. PLEASE REVIEW! =]


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